Dear Designer: How Do I Deal With a Difficult Client?
I’ve definitely had difficult clients. But after years of freelancing and running our agency, ilovecreatives Studio, I’ve realized that most “difficult client” situations aren’t actually about a difficult person. They’re about a difficult moment in the project.
I started freelancing because I wanted to get away from burnout and people who didn’t understand me. I decided I needed boundaries and I wanted to protect myself, but really I was bringing a lot of baggage into my freelancing business.
I’m all about boundaries, but in the beginning of my career, I would often use a boundary as a stop sign instead of giving the project what it needed: more momentum and less friction.
Your job as a Squarespace designer isn't only to make a great website. You’re also guiding someone through a creative process they may have never experienced before. I spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to avoid difficult clients. Eventually, I realized the more useful skill was learning how to navigate difficult moments.
Give your client the benefit of the doubt
When something feels off, our brains are very good at spiraling. When a difficult moment arose, I’d think: “They don’t respect my time. They’re trying to get free work. They don’t trust me!”
Taking a step back, you’ll realize that perhaps your client is juggling a major launch, a shifting budget, or an inbox with 28,000 unread emails. Sometimes they don’t have the language to say, “This doesn’t feel like us yet,” so they ask you to make the logo bigger.
Start with proactive empathy. Ask what’s happening before you decide what their reaction means. You could say something like: “I noticed we’ve gone back and forth on this page. Is there something about the overall direction that isn’t landing yet?” That question will give you much better information than quietly deciding your client is impossible.
One time, I had a client who was just mad. Before I assumed they were mad at me, or just an angry person, I could have said, “Hey, I don’t appreciate the way you are talking to me. I will not allow this.” Instead, I asked them, “Hey, is everything OK?” That question was enough for them to pause and open up about everything that was going on in their life. More importantly, they recognized that their tone wasn’t great, and they acknowledged that.
Giving someone the benefit of the doubt doesn’t mean ignoring a pattern. It means gathering the facts before you react in the most human way possible.
Stop problems before they start
When I first started working with clients, I thought avoiding friction was about identifying red flags and then avoiding whoever fit the bill. There are some people who are clearly not the right fit, but for most clients, you can never predict how the project will go. Even if they're the nicest people ever, the project can still get difficult.
Two things have helped me: Have a clear contract*, and assume they never read that contract, so over-communicate during the project.
Your contract should clearly explain what’s included in the project, how many rounds of feedback your client gets, when payments are due, what happens if the timeline is delayed, and how out-of-scope work is handled.
A strong process makes the relationship feel safer for everyone. The client knows what to expect, and you don’t have to invent a new boundary while you’re already annoyed.
But let’s be real: Most people will forget what the contract says, and the easiest way to reinforce your boundaries is with small reminders throughout the process. After every delivery, tell your client the actual day they should send feedback.
*Disclaimer: This information does not constitute, and should not be considered a substitute for, legal or financial advice. Each legal situation is different. The information provided is intended to be general. Please contact your financial or legal advisors for information specific to your situation.
Do not fall into the “I’m being nice” resentment trap
This is a sneaky one. A client asks for one extra thing, and you do it for free because you’re being nice. Then they ask for another. You say yes again, but now you’re keeping a mental tab they have no idea exists! By the third request, you’re furious and they think everything is going great.
You think you’re being nice, but that’s unclear communication.
If something is outside the scope, say so before you do the work: “This would technically be another round, but happy to add it for [amount].” Or, “This will extend the timeline by [time]. Would you like me to include it?”
If you decide to do the work for free because you have the margins, ensure they know: “This would normally be an additional fee, but I’m happy to include it this time.” And, sometimes, it’s really a 20-minute fix that isn’t a big deal. But if you don’t say anything before you do the work, that’s on you. And you can’t get mad at them later!
Give your client the chance to make an informed choice so you don’t resent them over a decision they never knew they were making.
If the process is not working, change the process
Some designers treat their process like it’s a moral document. The client didn’t follow the process, therefore the client is the problem. But a process is a tool. If the tool isn’t working, change it.
I recently listened to a talk from Brent David Freaney of Special Offer, who designed Charli XCX's iconic Brat album cover. He talked about how he loves bringing his clients into his Figma pages—I know, crazy! For some more opinionated or, ahem, creative clients, I really think this is the move. If you bring them more into the process, you get so much more buy-in during reviews.
Why wait for the same problem to happen again so you can be mad about it? Let’s redesign the experience. The process exists to help you and the client reach a strong result. You don’t get extra points for following a broken process perfectly.
The real skill is embracing awkward conversations
The designers who build strong client relationships aren't the ones who never have conflict. They’re the ones who notice friction early and don’t avoid it!
These conversations are so awkward, but awkwardness is usually a signal that something needs to be said. Embrace the awkwardness as soon as possible. Otherwise, you’re spiraling about it at 2:00 AM or complaining about it at dinner when you could be catching up with friends.
As long as you keep it human and are honest about what isn’t working before it gets really difficult, everyone on the project will feel relieved.
When you should walk away
Sometimes you try solutions and the relationship still isn’t workable. If a client is abusive, repeatedly ignores boundaries, refuses to pay, or makes it impossible to complete the work, your contract should give you a clear path to ending the project. You can still have empathy and end a relationship with grace.
You got into web design because you’re a creative person and you wanted to help people. I truly believe you’re capable of doing that beyond designing a website.
Related resources:
